Lately I have found the word "why", to be a repetitive word in my world. I have to say....when you really think about it.....we never really have the answer. Does it make us feel better to just say it, ponder it, mull it over? Isn't the definition of the word faith pretty much the answer to all of our why's? Shouldn't we just except that God knows what he is doing, and questioning the reasons "why", really isn't going to get us anywhere?
Why did you decide to adopt? Why Ethiopia? Why a toddler? Why not the US? Mommy, why is it taking so long, why don't we just go get him? Why not a baby?.....it goes on and on....
There are welcomed "why's" (especially when you know the answer), necessary "why's" (to know who drew on the wall) and the dreaded open ended "why" that only God can answer.
I have found that whether it be highs or lows.....the question "why?" is always our first thought. Why am I so lucky? Why did God choose me? Why is this happening?
WHY NOT!!!!...is my new answer. I have chosen to simply live by faith and KNOW that God is perfectly, divinely orgestrating my very blessed life. This wait may seem long and even extended....but at least he chose me to wait! God could have chosen someone else to be Lincoln's Mom.....he could have deemed me unqualified....but he didn't. I am blessed beyond words to have the privilege of being Lincoln's Mom no matter how hard or how long it may be.
I am blessed with a husband who said yes.......I am blessed with bio children that are beyond excited to meet their new brother.....I am blessed with an extended family that has a heart just like mine. Only God can do this. So, what I think of as a "not so perfect" plan IS perfect to God and I just have to have the FAITH it takes to know the difference.
I am going through "glitches" and highs and lows...but I know that these are the things that are drawing me closer to God. If waiting, and glitches are what he thinks I need, then I am saying, "why not"!
What is a post without a pic???? So I am going to leave you with one of the "why's" that was answered in my house recently..... Our daughter, H, has been one of the last kids in her class to start loosing teeth. I know, this doesn't seem like a big deal but to a child that is one of the oldest in her class.....it was a big deal! She wiggled, pulled on, and agonized over this tooth "situation". She would ask...."Why am I not loosing my teeth like everyone else?" I would simply say, "You will loose your teeth when you are meant to loose your teeth....we have no control over teeth falling out. I have no idea when Dad lost his first tooth but I can tell you as an adult it won't matter." I was even secretly glad that the teeth hadn't started falling out because I wasn't ready for the "awkward" toothless stage. Then as if it was a gift.....on her seventh birthday she lost her first tooth.....and they have been falling out like crazy ever since! So....why am I telling you this? Whether it is loosing teeth or waiting for a child.....we all have "why's". Having faith and knowing it will happen when it is meant to happen is a lesson that is not easy whether you are seven or thirty three!
I recently read a quote that I LOVE.....
"If God Calls you, He will equip you."
I am feeling equipped!